i heard a voice

here's a bit of a ballad that came to me on my late night watches of semi conciousness-a bit unorganized and sloppy, but i like how it turned out any how because that is a bit how my state of mind was during the time and matches the feel of the gales at night.

I Heard a Voice

Surging through that stormy sea

I heard a voice 

carried in upon the winds,

whispering low inaudible mutterings

that filled my soul with fear and dread.

Casting aft a murky stare-

glassy eyes strain towards the door,

darting round in hollow sockets 

weary from the savage storm. 

I hearken to, breath suspended,

taxing ears to what was spoken,

yet in this pitch of quailing doubt 

all that was that I could hear

was tired groan of creaking ship,

the shrieking of taught lines squeezing

battered mast and ground down rails, 

the eerie moan of wind whipped sails,

the desperate wail of seabird's cry-wind battered wings 

struggling to keep aloft 

in the yawning trough of snarling waves

ripping across the gaping void 

of endless time and open space.

I know it was a voice I heard! --

A spectral tone, a muted murmur

that slid inside my pallid skin, 

crawling like a wingless scarab 

dancing a slow scratching shuffle along my bones.

Where is it now, that phantom sound 

that iced my blood and chilled my marrow? 

My mind is sound-I heard a voice!--

It came whispering in upon the wind,

groaning faint and muffled tones

rasping low an awful note, 

rattling a quaking shudder

from the very depths of a soul 

that has never known such terror.

My heart drums loud and breath draws short,

my back is soaked in nervous sweat,

and teetering in drunken dread,

a savage roll casts me prone. 

Crawling anguished up the hatch 

I slither on the rain drenched deck

crying out into that tumult- 

"to whom or what am I beholden?

Absolve me of my terrible debt!"

My hair whips madly in the gale-

briny tendrils sting my eyes-

my ears are filled with terrible howling,

the inky blackness has me vanquished

in that deep dark night of moonless skies.

Desperately I claw at nothing 

as lurching reel pounds me round,

to and fro and back and forth

across the deck spinning madly 

fingers fraught and searching frantic

for line or cable, cord, or rope 

to rein this ride, slow the whirl. 

Finally slamming to a side

wrapping round the ragged rail,

pincer-ilke they will not fail- 

clasping tight, with iron clutch

steely knuckles crunching white.

We dip beneath, the side goes under-

I must endure this icy plunge,

be patient for this sturdy ship

to rectify her steady course 

and muster for the coming waves. 

Yet underneath roiling surface 

the course of time and violent motion are

as if by some strange hex or vile sorcery,

constrained by paralytic spell. 

The maelstrom roar is suspended

and ghostly silence interposes- 

a muted world, a shadowland,

this trident realm has long transpired

swirling through the timeworn ages-

a lost antiquity now forgotten.

The stream and surge of her currents

flow in peaceful ease of 

watery equilibrium.

Circulating smoothly, serenely,

she emanates a dark appeal- 

a soothing charm of dream-like tranquility, and,

like some murky temptress 

she beckons with enchanting pull.

Time breaks free from its restraint 

and this mythic scene swiftly shatters

as I am wrenched back to the turmoil 

amidst the seething froth and foam.

Still transfixed from what I witnessed, 

the taste of salt brings me back

into crashing world of 

frenzied chaos and wind whipped waves

whose hoary caps cast into space,

prick my brow with venom spray. 

The icy droplets trickle down 

leathered lines of weary face

weathered by a thousand tempests.

Propelled on, this saline slobber,

through thick maze of bearded bristle

touches tongue in gaping mouth

gasping for a vital breath.

Like the kestrels of the sea,

we speed swiftly down a swell,

a moving mountain shifting shape,

formed by force beyond the bounds

of human grasp and understanding

and strain the thought and stretch the mind

to unknown realms of the divine.

Countless monsters throw us skyward

and plunge us into dark abyss,

until this wild and desperate journey 

unfastens my remaining sense 

of cognizance and self-possession,

my fleeting imperturbability.

Through the jaws of snarling beast,

we are swallowed down into the belly-

like Pharaoh and his golden army

the red sea walls surround, engulf, 

and inexorably consume us,

and the weight of an infinite age 

crushes us down, down, down.

Again this water kingdom swims

soundlessly into my vision.

The boat is bobbing to the surface

but my eyes are caught far down below,

and she beckons. Beckons with

inescapable pull, and I feel my fingers

by no command of mine, 

loosen from their steadfast grip.

Wraithlike, I slip over the rails

of that ship, floating free into the serenity 

of that dark silent world of eel and squid.

I watch as bubbles carry aloft to the shadow 

of her hull my last expiration.

And sinking, I offer a final prayer

bidding guidance for my soul, 

and in my subdued concession  

that life above the sea was done,

it was then I realized

that the voice I heard

carried in upon the winds,

whispering low inaudible mutterings

that filled my soul with fear and dread,

had been my own.